Friday, April 24, 2009



Mr. Grumpy rolled out of the wrong side of the bed this morning (which means that he squished me in the process). He has been in a relatively exuberant mood lately, coming home every evening singing, joking around every morning as he is getting dressed, chasing a rambunctious Marty around the bedroom. Nice! But just one really horrible day at work followed hotly on its heels by one wrong word from a son and * zing * Mr. Crabby is back in town. What’s a girl to do?

He really does wear this t-shirt sometimes!

Well, obviously, the first thing that comes to mind is cook. He is off in Paris for a day of meetings, so I have the time to prepare ahead without him popping in unexpectedly for lunch and crabbing about. Maybe I can give the countertops a couple of swipes in order to give the appearance of clean, iron the laundry and actually fold up and put away the ironing board, maybe, just maybe, have the computer off before he walks in the door (or maybe not). And have something tasty and heart-warming waiting on the table when he walks in the door.

And gotta make the man happy before the weekend, or he’ll spend Saturday and Sunday stomping around the house grumbling, throwing things away in one of his I’m-in-a-bad-mood cleaning frenzies, yelling crazy madman type things about his sons (some of which are actually true) and just being downright cranky and gruff. Jamie no like!

"To the moon, Alice, to the moon!"

Truth be told, I would rather spend my weekend strolling with him hand-in-hand to the market, coming home and cooking with him, watching the strange and funny people scurry down the street below our front windows, chuckling to ourselves as we spot silly walks, look alikes or some of our favorite characters, picnicking with Marty in the vineyards Sunday morning, and ending the short respite from the rat race snuggling happily in front of a silly movie or an interesting documentary. I assume that any woman in her right mind would prefer the second scenario over spending the weekend with Sir Grumpiness of Crabby Kingdom.

So I turned to the old adage, “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach” and hoped that it also worked with his sense of humor and overall happiness as well. Now don’t get me wrong; throughout the years, on our long slog together through time that we call marriage, he has proven himself to be the most loving, romantic, fun husband that ever existed, caring, sharing and all those things that we sing about. But every good man has his bad day, bringing home trouble from the office, a bad night’s sleep due to the college kids upstairs, letting worries weigh him down and, as most men do, he goes ballistic! It’s every woman for herself and dive for cover! And my only defense is food. So out come the cookbooks and I start planning my military strategy.

What's a girl to do? Think!

I wanted to make a meal, not too heavy, not too complicated, that I could prepare ahead of time and leave in the fridge as I am not sure what time he gets back tonight. I settled on a big pasta salad with some cubed smoked chicken (smoked for extra flavor) and lots of vegis thrown in, all tossed with this fabulous Parmesan dressing, the tangy fusion of a vinaigrette and a smooth, creamy mayonnaise. Summery in its mixture of grilled Mediterranean vegetables and Parmesan goodness, this salad is made with the ease of a throw-everything-in-except-the-kitchen-sink meal, whatever is left over, in the fridge, on the counter, whatever your mood, or simply follow the season. Oh, and no dessert; that he could take personally (“I told you that I needed to lose a few pounds, so stop all this baking!”).

Whew! A woman’s work is truly never done!


1 egg
½ cup (125 ml) olive oil
½ cup (125 ml) vegetable oil
½ tsp salt (or to taste)
1 tsp freshly ground black pepper (or to taste) – I give a generous grinding
1/8 tsp Tabasco sauce (or to taste)
2 cloves garlic (about 1 ½ tsps) minced garlic
1 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
1/3 cup (85 ml) red wine vinegar

Whiz the egg in a blender, food processor or whisk by hand until light-colored and frothy, just starting to thicken.

Gradually add the oils, drizzling into the egg as you continue to whisk or blend, gradually creating a thick mayonnaise.

Yay! Did you know that you just made a mayonnaise?

Add the salt and pepper, Tabasco, minced garlic and whisk together. Add the red wine vinegar and stir and, finally, whisk in the grated Parmesan cheese.

Pour the dressing, a bit at a time, over your salad and toss, adding just the right amount for your quantity of salad.

This Dressing is also perfect served with steamed artichokes; it is our favorite dipping sauce!

For 4 – 6 people

½ lb (250 g) dried pasta (fusilli, orecchiette, penne, pennette, maccheroni or similar)
2 leg-thigh sections smoked or roasted chicken
2 zucchini
2 red peppers
1 small can corn
1 small jar artichoke hearts
4 ripe tomatoes or 1 pint cherry tomatoes

Or add any ingredients you please.

Cook the pasta until tender. Drain, run under cool water to stop the cooking process and drain again.

Roast, peel and slice the red peppers (once they are out of the oven, slip them hot into small plastic sandwich bags for a minute or two. The steam condenses and slips between the skin and the flesh, allowing you to lift the skin right off with the help of a small sharp knife).

Wash the zucchini, cut off the two ends and discard, then cut each zucchini in half. Slice each zucchini in slices, not too thick, not too thin, and spread out on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Brush each with a bit of olive oil and grill under the burner until starting to brown and bubble.

Drain the can of corn. Drain the jar of artichoke hearts and slice into bite-sized chunks. Cut the chicken away from the bone, peel off and discard skin and cut the meat into chunks. Slice and cube the tomatoes or slice cherry tomatoes in halves.

Toss the pasta, chicken and all the vegetables together in a large serving bowl. Very large! Toss in a handful or two of the rocket.

Pour about half the Creamy Parmesan Dressing over the salad and toss well. Continue to add the dressing and tossing until you have the perfectly dressed salad.

Serve with bread and a nice glass of wine. And a wifely smile!

Whatever your sitcom, after a meal like this, there is always a happy ending!


Maryann said...

Cute post! I knew this would do the trick :)

Karen Brown Letarte said...

Well, Jamie-- a proactive approach is always good!! This salad sounds absolutely divine. I am definitely bookmarking it as my guys would love it. I know he's trying to "lose a few lbs." but can you go wrong with having some long-stemmed strawberries on hand to dip in whatever (creme fraiche and brown sugar is my personal fav) in case the mood strikes??? Hope all is well, and Mr. Grumpy is banished. BTW, my DC has an "I'm Grumpy" hat from Disney World that he actually wears too, but as a joke.

:) K

Mary said...

I think he'll be properly appreciative. You've made a delicious meal.

Muriel said...

I would marry you all over again for a salad like that if I was him ;O)

The Cooking Photographer said...

Mr. Crabby Sir Grumpiness of Crabby Kingdom. Ginger I love your blog lol! I can't stop giggling

The beautiful pasta is a great idea, and hopefully everything turned out in your favor.

The Cooking Photographer said...

Omgosh Jamie I am so sorry. I have an abscessed tooth and infected jaw and I am so out of it I thought I was on Ginger's blog.

I hope you will forgive me. I love love love your post!

Rosa's Yummy Yums said...

What a scrumptious dish! That would make anybody happy!

I'm the grumpy one at home... Cleaning just makes me cringeand I get all cranky ;-P!!!

Cheers and have a great weekend,


Jamie said...

Laura - All is forgiven! Actually, when you called me Ginger I had idyllic visions of glamorous Ginger from Gilligan's Island so it made me laugh!

Karen - Love the "I'm Grumpy" hat! LOL!

He did finally come home in a happy mood YAY with a couple of work-related notches under his belt, so quite content. He loved the salad and so did Son #1 who scarfed up 4 servings of it!

Mindy said...

You're a much better wife than I am! I would turn into what we call a "grump-a-lump" too and refuse to do anything nice! ;-) After a day like that, you need a nice dessert more than he does!

Natashya said...

I could use some pasta salad to cheer me up. Good food is the great calmer of men, yes indeed!

Elyse said...

This definitely looks like a happy ending meal!! How delicious. That parm dressing sounds amazing. And who doesn't love a great pasta salad? Especially with all those wonderful veggies thrown into the mix. Great job! I'm sure Mr. Grumpy loved it.

Sippity Sup said...

Thanks for visiting SippitySup. I love the way you interwove your life into this "recipe". I use quates because this is so much more than a pasta salad. It's a sweet story anyone who lives with someone thye love can appreciate. Thanks for starting my Sat morning off on a happy note. I can be a Mr. Grumpy myself...GREG

Mrs. L said...

I prefer your version over Mr. Grumpy anyday!

Linda said...

I feel your pain!!! LOL
Make him the malted milk cheesecake and he will be smiling again! Thanks for stopping by. I like your blog!

asiangrrl said...

Jamie, I thought of Ginger from Gilligan's Island, too. If your hubby hadn't cracked under this pasta salad, then he wouldn't have been human. And you know if Clem ate four servings, it had to be good!

You can cook for me any time.

Dragon said...

I'm sure Mr. Crabby will love this. :)

Lien said...

I's love to eat that meal right now!

Culinary Wannabe said...

"Sir Grumpiness of Crabby Kingdom" - love it! I'm going to make my husband a crown with that on it and make him wear it when he's in a mood. That will either get him smiling or out of the house. :)

Jamie said...

Ashley - let me know how you pull that one off! I'd love to see a pic!
Haven't seen you for a bit and I'm glad to see you!

Chef E said...

I love how you use photos and props to express what your saying, and I should have one of those t-shirts to wear myself, like a dunce hat on a stool in the classroom moment!

Chopping up ingredients for a salad is also a great stress release, well for me...


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